Mother’s Day Reflections: The Last Interview I Recorded With My Mother

Mother’s Day, Memory, and the Quiet Influence of Parents

This Mother’s Day, I’ve been reflecting on my mother, Joyce Baughman, and the profound impact parents have on shaping who we become — often in ways we do not fully appreciate until much later in life.

Several years ago, during the final year of her life, I sat down with my mother and recorded hours of conversations about her childhood, education, family, and experiences growing up on a farm in rural Kansas.  What began as a personal family project became something much more meaningful with time.

She spoke about growing up in a multigenerational farming family, learning responsibility early, valuing education, and building a life centered around perseverance, faith, and family. She described parents who emphasized learning and intellectual curiosity, ensuring all of their children attended college at a time when that was far less common. 

What strikes me most now is not any single story, but the consistency of her values throughout every stage of life. She believed in resilience without complaint. She believed in supporting family quietly and steadily. Even during difficult years late in life, she remained remarkably positive and content. 

As physicians, surgeons, and professionals, we often focus intensely on achievement, metrics, productivity, and advancement. But many of the traits that define our character long before our careers begin are learned at home — through observation, routine, sacrifice, and example.

Looking back, I can clearly see how much of my own approach to medicine, education, discipline, and patient care was shaped long before medical school or residency. The foundations were already there.

One lesson I would strongly encourage others to consider: record the stories of your parents and grandparents while you still can. Ask questions. Preserve family history. Capture voices, memories, and perspectives. What may feel ordinary today often becomes extraordinarily valuable with time.

Happy Mother’s Day to all the mothers, grandmothers, and caregivers whose influence quietly shapes future generations in ways that cannot always be measured, but are deeply felt.